I have to lose something…
It isn’t weight…might as well be money!
I did not win at poker, I was up over 200 clams but there is no escape with money. After being awake for 19 hours I started to fade out…I mean you could still see me, no risk of that, but mentally.
And it isn’t a slow fade with a mind like mine. I donated and off I went home to bed.
Kamakaze diet
This morning I weighed in at 243.4 An absolute miracle.
I went to poker thinking I would not eat. I’d have 6 Michelob Ultra, a whopping 20 carbs. Hell I had saved up all week eating mainly protein.
So let’s see…20 carbs from 6 beers. Ricky Beiber brought egg salad sandwiches and meatballs.
Egg salad sandwiches on white bread…good old fashioned white bread from our childhood…that white fluffy bread doesn’t greet our kitchen often. I’m guessing Rick chef’d up 12 sandwiches…I ate no less than 6 of them…
Meatballs…I went easy on em…I had 7. Just 7? Well I was saving room for a family sized bag of chips, a large box of Mike and Ike, sour gummy worms, peanut M &M, honey roasted peanuts….I’m sure there was more…
The Kamakaze diet folks…go down in flames!
Hey…I’m not the only one…fat skinny Paul, Beagle, The M boys, and captain glaucoma were all digging in too.
Parker is flying south in T minus 12 hours…I had the credit card info punched in and just about to hit the buy button when I backed out…If it wasn’t the Dominican I might have been swayed…but I’ve almost been murdered there in the past…alone…trying to defend 4 drunken UKer’s against a swarthy bunch of Haitian’s wouldn’t be easy…
This lot needs the safe sanctuary of Cuba where it’s impossible to get killed…but no…
One of you will not be armed
My advice gentlemen…do not leave the resort without resort or tour staff from a reputable organization.
Never leave the resort at night regardless of who you are with…if the Prime Minister offers to bring you home for dinner…decline…politely.
The local girls on the beach at night are not lonely…the are NOT alone. be very cautious of your new friends…best not to make any.
There will be American’s here…you have UK accents…this means they hate you…
Lastly…use Kevin as a shield if possible…he weighs more than any 4 Dominicans that haven’t reach the MLB ( for you English that’s baseball…aka where a Dominican can put on 100 pounds in a season…naturally…wink wink)
I’m sure I’ll be missing a fabulous time, maybe next year.
I did order the parts to get the Cobra rolling again with the trip money…a fair exchange. The Quote of the day:
If there is a will there is a way. Dominican equivalent:
A buen hambre no hay pan duro -(When you are really hungry no bread is too hard to eat) Be safe guys…Parker…be good, if you can’t be good keep your chin in and your left high.
: )
Cheerio
