Displaying all posts tagged with Juicing

Sometimes a picture says 2 words…

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Another beautiful day! Freezing cold!

I took a day off the gym, a pleasure for sure.  Hit the sauna, the hot tub…and I ate right all day without any late night snacks!  The result…not much…if I lean just right on the scale I can get it to show 243…

Not what I was hoping for this morning.

Last night I was going to a little house warming slash hockey thing at a friends house, a few beers, a snack…then I received this!

Kevin at 242

The Wanker is less than me

I could have rotated this image for your viewing pleasure but you know what…the hell with that, turn the old noggin.

242.2 for Parker, the shakes are paying off for him it seems, much more than beer is for me!

For those that missed Parker’s comment on yesterday’s post, he is taking PGX shakes.  I haven’t had one, I can only assume they are delicious. Not to poo poo on the shakes…it ain’t whole food and at some point you are going to have to add a touch of broc…or a wee slice of toast with tea…

I worry that the body is having an easy time digesting that processed protein and the price will be pounds at the finish line…but Parker assures me he will see this to the end…which was the photo of skinny Parker posted yesterday.

Suck it blogger

Suck it blogger

THIS is what I received from Beagle!  The photo came with a wee message…Suck it Blogger!

Is that nice talk?  Or maybe he is referring to huffing helium from his balloons…

Beagle notes he is at 11 pounds lost and holding after Boston pizza, pasta, garlic bread, a coke, a box O’ Reese pieces and a box of mike and Ike’s.

What do you think of that Parker?

To be fair I have lost weight right…I’m at 243 from 249, that’s 6 poundareenos!

Today I will have to go to the gym…the Plyomax aka Midgetmax.  Yesterday I heard that a trainer at the gym referred to the ladies in one of the classes as stupid and lazy…one of the 50 year old ladies decided to walk out at that point to which was commented that pushups and situps aren’t for everyone…okay…

Further the Midgetmax…I was on a bike over the weekend doing a warm up when I saw a nice older woman, comfortably in her 60’s, hand a photocopy of an x-ray to her personal trainer for review.  I could see it was a big joint, looked most likely like a knee.  Young PT is under 25, and having completed his 2 day CANFitPro Personal Trainer certification is now able to review X-ray’s and offer prognoses…I mean in all likelihood the kid didn’t graduate high school.  As the young lad mulled over the sheet of paper, mainly black with the stark white reflection of a bone…possibly human…he looked at me over his shoulder…I wonder what he was thinking…

Man…I’m like a doctor now…wait until I tell suzy at the 7-11…

As I pedalled away I made my own prognoses of the situation, I know I wasn’t as close to the image as the young Certified PT was but I believe my assessment is dead on…

Jane…I have bad news…from looking at this photocopy of your leg x-ray I can tell you this…You’re HP Printer is running low on black ink…um Jane…do you have a letter from your doctor clearing you to work out with these concerns?

Sadly I was too far to hear what PT had to say to the kindly older lady…but I bet he promised her she’d be dancing like a teenager again if only she would sign and prepay for 12 months of Personal Training.

Which brings me to this…the first woman above…the walk out…The owner of the Midgetmax told her Point Blank that she would not see any improvement at all unless she signed up for personal training…

You know what…this same woman used to weigh over 300 pounds!!!  How some dirk can look over a woman enjoying such great success and tell her she will never succeed…

All Praise the Athletic Club when it opens a year from now…it will be hard to hold my midgetmax membership until then.

Who runs a business like this…its embarrassing.

Seeing as Parker and the Beagle both offered a measurable photo, here is mine…

150 degrees in the sauna

150 degrees in the sauna

It’s not all about weight…

So I got to sweat on the cheap, without all the heavy lifting and running. On cold Canadian days being in the sauna as the temperature creeps past 60 is nice, very nice…


The Quote of the Day!

Give me a smart idiot over a stupid genius any day.
Samuel Goldwyn




I loathe myself…its simple!

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Yes I’ve done some late night snacking, I’ve had beer and liquor, popcorn and candy, pop and chocolate bars…I’ve had late night meat and cheese, pizza and toast…I’ve had late night juicing…

Ahhhh….Late night juicing…THAT’s what I should have had last night!

Damn myself!  double damn me!!!

I woke up yesterday and clicked and clattered out my blog, the day in the life of flubber (notice I didn’t say old, fat, chunk or chubby).  I had scrambled eggs and sausage for breakfast thinking I’d keep the carbs low.

I went to the midgetmax and put in a good workout which included steady lifting and some time on the treadmill.  For lunch I had some chicken tortilla creation from my beautiful wife…the tortilla was lettuce…healthy again.  The kids got home between 2 and 4 and we started the decomposition of the adult mind.  At around 5 I decided it was time for one tiny beer with my neighbor which became 2 and a wee tiny portion of Chivas…

Yes, that is not good, bad bad bad…but when I returned home I did nothing but have a bit of meat, no more carbs…My lovely wife was out teaching brownies yoga…or doing a kettlebell class for a young girls soccer team…whatever…it resulted in her coming home with 2 boxes of girl guide cookies!

chicken tortillas

chicken tortillas

You see that lunch right there, chicken, tomato, red pepper and avocado…what do you think the health benefits of that are over the course of a day that includes 2 beers, a shot of Chivas and a box of girl guide cookies?

Pardon?  I wonder if the chocolate ones or the vanilla ones are more beneficial…which has more antioxidants…To be safe I tried to have an equal number of each which I believe was somewhere around 10!

Where does that leave me on the scale?

244, same as yesterday…a GD groundhog day like every other GD groundhog day.  What did I expect?  I knew exactly what was going to happen this morning on the scale…in fact I was surprised to see it hadn’t gone up…a testament to hard work in the gym!

That skinny Parker is still down a pound a day, informing me yesterday he has lost 18 pound on the miracle shake diet.

shake diet

Skinny Parker

Parker has been on the shake diet for 18 days and has lost 18 pounds.  I don’t even know where these shakes come from to tell you the truth, the grocery store, isagenix, some home made recipe…I will find out and report back.  I’m not entirely jealous of Parker’s new physique, I mean yes it would be nice to lose 18 pounds right now but I’m not sure I want to take the shakes…I really sort of like food… and beer…and cookies!

There was a time not too many years ago that I ran at least 5 k every day, the gym 4 days a week and drank beer and ate ice cream every day…  I was 205 pounds and was much stronger than I am now.  I think its the k’s I’m missing at this point…You see there is no doubt I can maintain this weight doing what I’m doing now…I just don’t want this to be the weight I’m maintaining!

Anyway, we are supposed to snow shoe for hours to no end next week and I’m not sure if skinny Parker is going to make it…he is safe against bear attack though…I’m going to be on the menu long before skin and bone Parker.  Beagle isn’t offering up pictures of the scale this week, that could mean the Colonel has dropped into his life.  One whiff of the Kentucky Fried goodness and Beagle would lose a pound of saliva on the spot!  He hasn’t eaten in 14 days!

Today I should eat more of the chicken tortilla thing…it was a delicious meal and props to my lovely wife for putting it together…at one time she could burn a grilled cheese at every attempt!  Well she is beautiful and can out lift Parker and Beagle…There is so much fitness going on at my house that tiny 3 year old Charlotte will randomly do burpees or a few kettlebell swings…She has been throwing together new healthy recipes for some time now…there are hits and misses…You see if the recipe calls for sugar…something must go in it, honey, a few bananas…hell some berries, some sort of sweetness.  Almond flour is not a substitute for sugar…

Today I may take the day off the gym, I felt tired yesterday and was weaker…5 days of straight lifting is tiresome.

I hope you all a great day, those of you in the arctic like myself…stay warm!  Sauna Time!!!

Quote of theeeee Day:

Did you ever see the customers in health – food stores? They are pale, skinny people who look half – dead. In a steak house, you see robust, ruddy people. They’re dying, of course, but they look terrific.
Bill Cosby

There is a place in between too much and too little…not many of us have found it and most that think they have are lying to themselves.



Strike a pose…

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I had the misfortune of commenting on a fellow facebookers post regarding Kevin Ogar, the 28 year old crossfitter recently paralysed while competing.  And I understand her passion for the sport, she is active in it so is her spouse.

Kevin was 6’2, 210 pounds.  In great shape.  He was attempting a snatch of 235 pounds when he lost his balance and released the bar behind himself, it hit standing plates, bounced back and struck his spine.  His life is changed forever.

Initially,as she refered to the lift as successful, I commented that I didn’t see the lift as a success. Most undeniably a failure.  It became a conversation regarding our decomposition of the video available of the accident.  Being a bit of a geek I downloaded the video from Youtube, giving me the ability to break it down frame by frame I could clearly see him lose his balance…he bailed badly and got unlucky with a bad bounce. In the end she took it as an attack against crossfit, something I see plenty of CFer’s jumping too conclude, that any comment is an attack rather than a personal observation…we just don’t understand…

Kevin was a certified crossfit professional, level 1, he took a weekend course.  I note on his profile page that he also attended one or more specialty courses, although they did not promote his crossfit level.

I comment on this in regards to the fitness industry entirely, the bologna certifications you can receive over a weekend.  You see there are no real governing bodies over these certifications.  A Canfitpro certification is a piece of paper, as is crossfit, wellness coaching, yoga instruction, spin… it’s created to make money not to entirely benefit the participant.

At the gym Friday I was on the squat rack when a guy organized a seated bench under the smith machine to perform a shoulder press.  Not being a certified instructor but having worked out for decades it’s my personal opinion that a shoulder press should not be done on the smith but that’s just one fat old man’s opinion.  Besides, there were 2 personal trainers at the Plyomax at that time, one of them could give him direction.  Between sets I stand by while this guy racks out 450 pounds on the smith.  I’m out of my mind at this point as I doubt an NFLer could shoulder press 450…  He sits and the bar is set at a safety point about an inch below his max extension, he would be able to clear the safety if he had the ability…he lifts the weight…shaking and shuddering he tries to clear the safety while I watch…if he clears this safety and unlocks his arms he will be killed certainly…

Luckily he was unable to do it….he shakes and sputters…but releases the bar, writes down on his workout sheet what I suppose he considers a successful lift, and off he goes to murder himself somewhere else.

My point is…a good coach a certificate program does not make you.  If this had happened at the Anytime Fitness in Manotick one of the personal trainers would have put it to an end.  I don’t currently lift there but when I did the trainers there were always willing to give advise, for your safety and to aid in your gains…or losses, whichever you were looking for.  Now, there are trainers at that gym with the highest level of certification from Canfit, not that I put weight on that…but they took the time to go many weekends.  Plus they own the place…they are standing guard over their investments…which include the gym and it’s customers.

If a coach at the crossfit competition had thought to move the weight stack back Kevin Ogar would be walking today.

Now Crossfitters say that they push past the limits, and that is the rube.  At the gym you should stop once you can’t make a lift in perfect form.  At that point you have done too many with too much, either take some weight off and go again or take a break.  I can point you to plenty of videos, Kevin’s and others, showing lifts with terrible form, over weighted attempts.  Coaches standing by…

grumpy old fat men

grumpy old fat men

Anyway…that is a Rant…I admit it.  On to other topics…

Zizi’s kitchen for dinner on Friday…delish of course.  Ate too much and drank a few too.  You really must give it a try.

I have hit the gym steady since Thursday, again later today in an attempt to lean out.  Leg day which is moving up on my list of things to do.  On Friday I went to the gym with a bakers cyst and thought I might as well do a couple squats to see how it felt…and that on a non leg day!  Well I squatted out 300 and my knee actually feels better…go figure.  The day I hate most these days seems to be back and biceps, that day incorporates plenty of wrist and my recent break is not 100%.

Parker is down 17 pounds on the shakes, Russett probably the same, and fatty hasn’t lost anything…I have gained the strength back I lost while in a cast though, my weight should start to ween away shortly.

What gets me here, packing on pounds?  Family, injury, indulgence…  I put on 20 pounds when Charlotte came along, eating with Ev and working out less and less, a torn ACL took me away from sports, another 10 pounds, a dislocated shoulder took me out of the gym…another 10…a broken wrist…it goes on and on.

None of the above was able to slow down my eating and drinking…praise to the tiny baby geezus for that. I may not be in the shape I was in at 28, or 35… but I’m getting it done.

I know…a sombre post from Chunk today…but it is the weekend and weekend posts are the exception.

Quote of the day, for my crossfit friend:

Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be.
John Wooden


Is Liquor Quicker?

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The man diet continues…I was a reasonably good boy yesterday, only taking a couple HUGE missteps on the bath to thin.

I tried a bit of a fast yesterday.  In the past I’ve done some reading on fasting diets which involve not eating for a 16 our period, half of which you are potentially sleeping anyway…so I had breakfast late, 3 eggs scrambled on protein pita.  The protein pita packs 10 grams of protein with just 100 calories and just 6 net carbs…add 18 grams of protein from the eggs and you just ate a shake.  Delish!

I don’t mind fasting and it is supposed to be beneficial to men…but not women so my female listeners shouldn’t bother with that.  Ev, my darling wife, has attempted fasting diets in the past for a few days until she read a study which indicated that women should not partake…

Anyway…I fast again this morning…let’s refer to it from this point forward as the temporary starvation diet…right now I’m starving myself.  The joys!  It’s not as bad as it seems, and many may site studies saying that if you eat breakfast you can be thinner than those that skip it…in my opinion that depends on what is consumed at breakfast and after.  McDees 3 times a day is not the answer.

Dinner….um…well it started off with a juice.  We over here at the fat man’s house decided we might try to juice for dinner this week.

So…at 5 pm I had a delicious juice containing broc, cauliflower, red pepper, carrots, beets, kale and spinach.  It’s super good stuff really.

Sounds good doesn’t it?  Sounds like I had a pretty good diet day?

Well at 6 my neighbor that owns Treats came by with a bag of muffins…I went back to his house for a wee scotch…just a wee one…and returned home at 7 for….drum roll…a muffin!


No really…

Okay fine, I had 2 muffins….just the tops…fine fine…and a bag of beef jerky…


Does that sound bad to you?  Well I did choose the bran muffin and the low sodium beef jerky…I was trying to do the best with the tools I had available.

No let’s talk about results for a moment.  Today’s weigh in?

242 Even.  Not bad.  Sadly I think this was my starting weight for the man diet this time last year…BUT…I was under 240 and had been pretty much all year until I broke my wrist in early November.  Self loathing and cheesies took over at that point…

lost a little weight on the man diet

Johnny walker diet?

Today I shall go to the gym!  I have 95% use of my arms with only mild agony.  I no longer have to stoop over to urinate…Yep, it’s been that much fun!  Standing with my arms at my side is almost possible..it hurts but I’m capable of doing it.  I no long have to walk around wearing a jacket to have pockets I can put my hands into thus not making me look like a Pregnant T-Rex.  How do you explain that to people…do you wear a sign?

HI, I’m normal, I walk like a T-Rex because I’m old and went too hard at the gym!

I have to ask old ladies at the grocery story to get me items off the shelf…from the middle row…My arms are so useless if I tried to grab something from the bottom shelf I’d bang my head…and I am NOT kidding.

BUT…I will go to the gym today…yes I just grimaced

I’m not talking about this guy:

grimacing at the man blog


grimace before McDonalds

grimace before McDonalds








That pretty much sums it up right there…

Today will be more of the same I hope…on the weight loss side anyway…Sit here and do a bit of coding…dream about being thinner (positive thinking)…and prepare myself for the gym.  I sort of promised myself I’d do 3 things this year.  One of which is under way, losing weight, the other 2 I haven’t really started yet…sadly they are bring my coding skills up to where I want them to be…so studying, and getting back at the guitar…so playing.  I’ve been doing some web development from home for a couple years now and when Charlotte goes to school in the fall I do need to get a bit busier…at home or in an office…the agony!

So much to do…I still need to swap out the transmission in the AC and hopefully repaint the thing!  Warmer days ahead.

I still have 357 days right…

Today’s quote from an unknown source:

Life isn’t about waiting for the right time to come. It’s all about doing all the right things in the time that is given to you.



Juice, Gym….Jelly beans? I’m looking for a word that works here…

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Might as well be Joker!

Zee good news is…drum roll please…I lost 4.8 pounds yesterday.

Let’s not start doing cartwheels just yet, this is man weight, I can gain that back in a few minutes…any minute now really.

The play by play…(to the rhythm of A day in the Life by the Beatles)…

I woke up, got out of the sack, juiced two pounds of veg and thought I must be smoking crack…

Yes, I hit the juicer for breakfast, delish really.  Carrots, kale, orange pepper and asparagus I do believe. Let’s have a look…



wait…I forgot broccoli!

For lunch I had chili, a fall back of mine, the recipe from a men’s health book I read long ago, the testosterone diet.  High protein, low fat, high fiber, some carbs…and tastes great.

Dinner….Salmon and more broccoli.  This broc was in the chewable format.

For an evening snack at poker I had 7 beers.  You heard it here folks, 7 beers and I still dropped almost 5 pounds.

What?  Is that even possible?

Man Weight baby!  Plus I did make a foray to the gym.  I attempted a trip to the local Plyomax, the new gym just opened in my neighborhood.

Not open you say?  On the busiest workout day of the year?  That’s right, pack up your new years resolution!  If you swore you were going to hit the gym every day in the new year and have a spanking new membership to the Plyomax in Riverside South you can scratch one off the list.  That’s 2 strikes for the plyomax.

1. Destroying 4500 New Years resolutions

2. Having equipment designed for people under 5 foot 10 inches.

I mean I’m not much over the average male height at 6′ 3″ but a bit of exercise equipment from Torque, which is the source at the Plyomax, is simply not set up for anyone over 5′ 10.  I can normally Angle Leg Press around 700 pounds, but the starting point on the Torque machine has my knees behind my ears…Kind of makes me feel like a lady of the night…  Anyway, no chance of pulling that off, it’s not safe…neither is trying to Angle Leg Press 700 pounds from that starting position.

Does that mean I was out of luck?  No Sir!

I still have a GoodLife membership!  And the GoodLife is always open!

Pardon?  Two gym memberships?  But of course, you can’t get into this physical form without 2 gym memberships…

That’s all folks, it’s 5:30 am, maybe I should try to get back to sleep…

Had to come back…quote of the day brought to you by

Steve Martin – Nothing I do is done by popular demand.