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Starving may be a thing….

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Yesterday I had 2 eggs and a slice of rye toast for breakfast…lunch….a bowl of home made soup….dinner…a steak…and some chicken, a salad…..I may have had an ice cream sandwich….wait….no….I had 2   …..we are out of those if I don’t buy more!

Then….poker…it is Wednesday after all…and like the man blog of new old and always…we do get out once in a while….

I won $130, drank 4 beers and left….I may have eaten several handfuls of bits and bites….on my way home I stopped for snacks for the kids….chips, a bag of twinkies, dip….a bag of bits and bites….

Ya…I ate some of or all of all of the above….

today’s weigh in….239.4  Up

Hey….30 days starts on the 9th doesn’t it?

Russet……he had a salad at lunch….no dinner.  zip nothing ,nada…..he did have track suits…at some point in the night he switched to diet track suits….which means zero cal red bull…..he did eat some bits and bites…I saw it.

His weight….200.6

So….he starved himself and lost…..5 pounds…is that the key?

OR….maybe the first salad Russett has had in 2 years did the trick….the man shat 5 times during poker….it’s his once every 24 month cleanse….one leaf of lettuce will do that to you if you haven’t had a veg in years.

No updates from Krista and Richard today….guess what that means????

Richard D'aoust and Krista Kelly
I’m still being nice…..ish

I haven’t heard much in the way of niceties from Seamus in regards to his shirt yesterday, a bit of abuse….but that’s about it….he is up.

I bet you Seamus is over 340….Richard I’m guessing is down….378.

Krista….her husband is telling her to send the weigh in….anything to make the photos stop!

Krista…unlike the rest of us here, does work out and sweat and eat right….all the important stuff.

Not that Seamus isn’t getting a good old fashioned sweat in …like OLD fashioned….I’m not sure if this is photoshopped or not…I just stumbled onto it….

Seamus Browne
Ya….I don’t know what to say about that…it is what it is people say…I’ve heard…

You can tell from the photo…at that point in his life he was working out….HARD!

The Quote of The Day
I’m looking forward to the future, and feeling grateful for the past.
Mike Rowe

The man blog is what it once was…better…a laugh….

As I’ve said 100 times…Ev would be anxiously awaiting me to say it’s done so that she might read what punishment lay ahead for my buddies….a diet ongoing for 6 years plus….

One of these days we will actually lose weight….well not Seamus….but the rest of us…even Kevin will get skinny some day……………

Babe….XO…big stuff in the works here…and I know you love it.

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The show begins….

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The Fat Man Blog

It’s on, Russett laid out a proclamation…he plans on losing 30 pounds in 30 days….by Thanksgiving our friend plans on coming in at 175 pounds….

So me…what do I do….agree to attempt the same.

Russett is 204.6

I’m 236.6 this morning, down from my official 30 day challenge weigh in of 238.6….and really, I’m down from 244 last week, which is when I decided I was going to do this…..diet…

The decision came during the HTG street party, some time between 11pm and 3 am….the days clearest hours.  Not a super big deal…but standing there beside Auns reviewing the crowd….it just struck me….this is too much…and Ev would not be happy…might as well dial this down a bit.  I’m not the spring chicken I once was!!!!  Do I really need 3 dinners every day?

So this is it…a diet in my life means 1 dinner…it doesn’t mean I’m restricting very much…well candy bars….I won’t be able to have 10 of those a week like I normally do but I did manage a wee bit of home made banana bread last night….it won’t eat itself!!!!  I can’t toss it out!

So…I’m just eating better, I’ve had a salad every night for dinner since monday….and not just a salad, the entire salad….oh wait…and a nice tenderloin Monday Tuesday and Wednesday…and salmon last night….So, ya, not starving.

Wait….I had a glass of red wine last night….it’s good for the heart….and the soul….maybe I should have one now….no…5:30 am….I’ll have coffee….one second………..

Done…nice.

Okay…along with Russett and I on this journey will be Krista…she will not lose 30 pounds in 30 days…as far as I can tell from her sweat lathered facebook posts she likely has nothing left to lose…but she is one of these beach body coach people….she has a misssion.  We will include her anyway….Then there is Richard from across the street….

Richard across the street…..sorry buddy…if you read this….sorry…

Richard told a few of the HTG boys maybe 6 months ago that he was starting a diet…he weighed in at a svelt 380 pounds and his goal I believe was to lose 80 of those….so he wouldn’t be having a beer with us….well…maybe just one….ish.  An hour or so later Richard’s wife stopped by with a cookie….

…..No word of a lie the thing was as big as a dinner plate…freshly wrapped in plastic while sitting on a Styrofoam plate…the cookie was too big to support it’s own weight…..

Richard was called out on this wee treat and told us he would just be eating half….the man actually took him xmas ham sized hand and rested it on the cookie showing us the half he planned on eating…..first….

oh my geezus…..I love it.

well 6 months later and Richard says his diet start Monday….so he is in,

Oh…just remembered…Russett and I have a bet, who ever loses the least weight by thanksgiving has to buy a bucket of KFC for the other….its low carb….

Of course we will include terrible photos of Kevin Parker and Seamus into the mix…and whatever else I dig up…like this old treasure…..

Kevin Parker

Which is actually my favorite photo of Kevin…I love it…it’s not even photoshoped….not like this next one.

Kevin Parker is immortal at the man blog

So…before I close the fat man blog portion for today I would like to finish of with one important note….

This is not fat shaming.  We are fat…and obviously not ashamed….What is fat shaming anyway….feeling bad for eating too many bonbons?  Nope…we eat our bonbons without shame…..

The Lifey Bit

Charlotte asked me on Monday if I would be sharing Mommy’s stone, to which I responded yes.  I told her I would be happy to be beside mommy when the time came….it’s an odd conversation to have with my daughter but the questions do come up…and at least when I’m put in the ground I won’t be rolling solo!

Her little friend was standing beside her trying to figure out what in God’s name she was on about….but that too is the Lifey bit.

What else do we have…Syd got a new job yesterday, she will be creating ice cream wonders at DQ starting Tuesday…fun stuff…Ave is at Grandmas for Bridgitte’s wedding, Rhi is pulling in shifts like crazy and really coming out of her shell…and Charlotte has 20 hours of ice this week……….

I’ve been up since 3am…and now I’m going to attempt a the first of 30 30 day shreds with Jillian Michaels….Ev is either smiling or laughing her ass off….we shall see.

The Quote of The Day

Shame is the most powerful, master emotion. It’s the fear that we’re not good enough.
Brene Brown

What is good enough….Have I been good enough….good enough son….brother…father…friend….lover….human….

No….I haven’t been good at all of these things all the time….but I try….if I fail I try again….harder….I do try….

One thing I won’t be shamed for….sitting here writing my feelings….I will deny them face to face…but sitting here I will not be shamed….

and that kids makes me sad….

Time for some punishment….Ev style

Babe….you better hope this doesn’t kill me…..

XO

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Parents or Guardians sign below….

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Parents or Guardians sign below….

Good morning….welcome to my sideshow….

This morning I completed Syd’s request for transportation to Canterbury…the Arts program does afford her some luxury, I do believe the school will get her from pretty close to our front door…a perk…

Not a perk in my life is filling out these forms…late of course…lots on my plate.  You see these types of documents ask for the signature of a parent or guardian…

And although I am loco parentis in the eyes of the law, the legal term for a non biological parent caring for a child, aka crazy parent….I am not the legal guardian of the ladies.  Their Father, I use the term very loosely, hasn’t offered it up…he would prefer I spend a little of the girls University education on a legal team to argue the issue…It’s not a problem to get, my lawyer has already told me it’s a done deal…but it does come at a cost unless it’s handed over….something he had agreed to do when Ev was alive, I have that in writing…but anyone can change their position in life and I suppose he has decided to change his…

At least he has the good sense to stay away….the girls do not need any ripples in the life I try to keep as smooth as possible….

You see….I love my ladies….they are mine.  I’m willing to share of course…but I want to know they are safely in their beds at night…well loved and cared for.

And so does Todd….I won’t take that from him…he knows they are safe and I know he appreciates what I’m doing…I know….

Okay…I feel good this morning…a wee rant…and away we go.

I did make a short detour on my way home from a trip to the UPS store in Ogdensburg to visit Ev…it isn’t easy to be there…but I find so much peace…and soon I’ll bring a lawn chair and a newspaper and spend some real time…..close….

Victor Wheeler and Evelyn Wheeler

Old, Fat and Limping…

The old boys do gimp around quite a bit…let’s recap Monday night soccer…the lineup.

Of the man blog fatties, 4 of us play on the same soccer team, only Beagle foregoes the kick around preferring baseball…I true fat mans sport.  You’ll seldom find a soccer playing drinking a beer at halftime…

This past Monday was our first game…Trafford sat out injured…He might be onto something….

By half time Boyling was sidelined, Parker was agonizing over his back and my knee was screaming….I spent most of the overnight Monday fighting calf cramps…

As much an issue of rehydrating post game with beer and scotch as old man pains…

I may have to reconsider my re-entry into soccer….I prefer to keep a little knee around for 5 k’s and snowboarding…but next week we wear a knee brace…and play less!

Kevin Parker, Andy Trafford, Richard Boyling, Victor Wheeler
I’m not sure I received all the weigh ins this morning…no big deal.

Some are up…some are down…

Tomorrow I’ll get everyone’s update and post it…

I am up though, 224.4 pounds this morning…I’ve been eating the house….delicious….

Boyling up….194

Beagle way down at 197 pounds

Poker and Jerk Chicken tonight…once I get back from Ave’s soccer game.

The Quote of The Day

There are only two lasting bequests we can hope to give our children. One of these is roots, the other, wings.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

When I say I live for my children….I mean it.

I love my ladies and I try my best to show them every day….this is the reason why Ev loved me…because although I may be a little rough around the edges….I know what love is….and I’m eager to show my children…my family…friends….strangers.

We are all together in this folks….we should be trying to give each other wings….

Sunny and warmer….get out there and enjoy it….

And wish that stranger a great day….screw it….

Babe…it’s all taken care of…me…us…we will all be okay…I love your face……….always

XO

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Fat….

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And the winner is…

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Another Wednesday night poker…

cold poker

At least the cards were hot…

I actually tried to get out of this one but had trapped myself with poker chips in my truck…the last of the Yurting punishments.

I took it easy on the food yesterday, and last night…I may have had 4 or 5 ribs…plus…some scotch and beer.

All of that and guess what…243 even.  Not bad…

No word from Parker…am I to assume he is waiting for a couple days of shakes before he gives the nod to the scale?  He did have quite a few feasts on the yurting trip…all but one included syrup!

No Syrup?

No Syrup?

Maybe we will hear from him today!  I can tell you he said he’d be back on the shakes…no wide eyes for that!

Beagle is down to 195!  He is 10 pounds away from his target and 10 days out from his vacation.  Yesterday before poker he had nothing to eat…zero…nothing…nada…he did consume 1 single chicken wing at poker….one…and 10 tracksuits, at 7 pumps a piece that has got to be 26 ounces of liquor and a dozen redbulls…

I’m not sure how he is feeling today…lighter than me for sure…but the old intestinal track has got to be reeling.

Last night at poker was a ‘snow day’.  Which is called from high when we are going to consume monstrous amount of booze-ola…I didn’t get in too deep, I think I was home around 2ish, $575 in pocket to boot!  The dozen plus ounces of alcool I managed to put back aren’t leaving me in the best of resolves today but I’ve been worse…like Monday morning of the frozen yurting trip…I can feel my face today…no need to check for frostbite!

My guitar practice is coming along nicely…rocksmith 2014…it’s great!…I’m also working through Justinguitar online lessons too, it’s more about learning individual chords than is Rocksmith…it kind of teaches a method I guess…Anyway, I think if I keep up at this pace I’ll be rocking out in no time!

Oh…no gym for me this week…I should go hit the treadmill but I really don’t feel like it…har har…we will see if that changes.  My wrist is killing me…it’s swollen from dealing cards, I don’t see bench pressing as an option.  Beagle has been pounding out time on his elliptical, he sent me a photo of the screen which show he went 2 km in 23 minutes.  How do they calculate that…by stride length?  Beagle is on there trying to strike a balance between floating and flying away…2 more balloons and the entire machine will be laying up against the stipple…And we wonder why there is a helium shortage…it’s a none renewable resource Beagle, go easy!

No more balloons?

No more balloons?

So that’s it for today, I strive to eat well today much like yesterday…without the beer and scotch…I know…empty promises to myself…

Chunk is hoping to fly south too…Beagles used up all the cheap options so I guess I’ll be looking to fly via jet…hopefully one seat will be enough for me!

Beagle sent me the Quote of the day yesterday…a bit crude but here goes:

The easiest way to be Happy is to simply not give a fek what others think of you.

-Beagle

I think Beagle, Parker and I have that one down.

Cheerio…stay warm!

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No Rest For the…

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Fat? No that’s not it…
No rest for those that can’t bend there arms? Yep. That’s me.
Up at 3 am after 4 hours of sleep. I have about 80% movement in my arms…with only mild pain.
It’s been what, 5 days, I should be over this by now no? Nope, old fat man, in pain for a week for sure.
After all this…once I can move…I gotta go back to the gym and do it all again…
How does that make any sense! It’s on though, it’s a go for pain.
Let’s look at the bright side shall we?
I weighed in at 244.4 pounds this morning. Back on track at least.
How did I perform this feat?

Juicing to the oldies

Juice…Juice…Juice…

Le jus.  Oui Oui.

Outside of the juice I managed to sneak in an egg, and just before bed…the gobble monster came out and fixed himself a wee snack.  All Natural crunchy peanut butter on a slice of protein pita.  It could have been worse…

Check out the protein pita, the stuff tastes good and its packing 10 grams of protein per pita.

Today I think I’ll hit the juice at some point, it’s good stuff, everyone should try it!  I’m not sure about the hype, but I do believe that pulverizing veg into liquid must provide me with some health benefit…there has to be more antioxidants in liquefied cauliflower than there are in a twix bar.  Based on color alone I’m going to go ahead and give that a nod…

Outside of that what did I do yesterday…Hot tub…watched some of the series Justified which is pretty good, I’m catching up on it…what else…what else.  Oh, I had to drive to walmart at 7 pm to get supplies to complete school projects which are due today upon the girls return after the holidays.  These things must be left to the very last minute!  Now it looks like ice rain may provide them with an extra day of the old Vacay…we shall see soon enough.

Let’s spend a moment on the Parker diet…Parker, the king of Life Insurance, is busy trying to ensure he makes a few more payments on his policy before his wife cashes it out…the skinny little bugger started off at 262 and was down to 254 when I talked to him 2 days ago.  That is serious man weight-loss.  He is on a 4 shake a day diet, serious punishment.  His goal is to be in the 230’s for the Goalden Boys Yurting trip scheduled on the 26th.  He has lost the easy 10, the man weight is gone, now the work begins.

I do believe his diet does not include much of the beer, scotch, chips and chocolate that mine has up to this point…Him getting into the 230’s is a lock I believe, personally I hope to be there this week.  I might have been already if I hadn’t tried to use wonderbar to ease the pain in my arms…VONDERBAR!  Nope, no good for arm pain.  I’m drinking scotch and Parker is drinking water while socializing…hmmm…I wonder if water IS the way to go?

We will be following Kevin’s progress here…a shot out to his website www.lifeinsuranceottawa.ca.  For those in the know I just deleted a paragraph referencing my buddy beagle…I better wait until his mancapade begins before I start discussing his diet…or lack of…

Is that it?  Probably not but I need another coffee…the last one in the house and the grocery store doesn’t open for another 3 hours…

Quote de jour (the French today is due to the French project I helped complete 5 hours ago):

Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
Frank Sinatra

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