Just because?

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You would figure I’d have this sorted out by now….but I don’t.  I still grieve….impossibly I still find myself at this.  It’s like I’m stuck doing something I love that is terrible for me…..an addict…..in love with something that might harm me…..

I don’t want to find myself in my truck driving home from the gym….or the pub…..in tears….

I don’t want to do that anymore…..

How do you stop that?

How does that come to an end?

I certainly do not know….nothing I have tried to this point has worked….helped….sure, the worst of it…..

Now, I try the gym…..every day….to what end I’m not sure, it certainly has kept me out of the pub….

Anyway….I’m not asking for much…..I just don’t want to feel pain anymore……

The Weigh In

Kevin Parker has joined the gym.  I will do my best to work out with him until he gets it….my lord he is going to hurt on Wednesday this week…..lol  Parker weighs in at 252 pounds.  Slim……ish

Keivn Parker gym

Who should we start with…the losers or the gainers?

I suppose the losers….just 2 folks, Ayhan and Arthur.

Scottish_tourist_Ataturk_tattoo

Until this moment I didn’t even realize the Scottish Turkish thing was a thing….geezus…

Arthur is down to a svelte 193 pounds, his goal is 185 pounds, not too lofty….Ayhan is at 186.4, he offered up everything he ate this weekend…I mean, he might be on to something….he is losing more than anyone at this point.  I won’t give you the expose on just how many berries Ayhan demolished between 5:30 and 5:32 on Saturday….Just know….I know……..

Okay….the gainers….

Priouz hits the scale at 159.5, there is a chance that he is wearing one of his fancy airport belts…….I hope not…..How many pounds of Iranian gold is that Pirouz?

Vinnie….Vinnie….Vinnie….You can’t eat at Mother’s all weekend long and expect to lose buddy….that pasta is only worth while if you’re carb loading for a marathon….and let’s be serious…..

3.italian-21

That isn’t happening….Vinnie managed 177 pounds this morning.  His goal is just 170…no problem!

Poor Old Beagle……198.1 pounds…..

sean-pizza

What do you say in a situation like this….I mean…..

Beagle’s goal…amputation of a limb I suppose….because that’s the only way he is ever going to see 185 pounds….

Me?  Well I was even this morning, 239 pounds.  I have been putting in the work, I know that at least some of the weight that is on me today is muscle that was fat a couple of months ago…..to be fair….I am getting big….and I intend to get bigger.  I’m going to continue working out like mad, attempting to hit the protein requirements to build muscle….and about Febuary 1st….2 weeks before we fly…..I’m going to crush myself….zero carbs….

I’ll drop 10 pounds easy.  It won’t get me under 220….but so what

The Quote of The Day

Truth is everybody is going to hurt you: you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.
Bob Marley

Well folks….that’s it for another day….

Today will be fabulous….I will smile…

To be fair….if you’re at Movati at 8 pm tonight to see Kevin Parker’s first attempt at lifting weights in his life….

There will be a few laughs….and I think a pint at the pub afterwards.

Love you all….even the asses…..

Babe…..my god…..I miss you……..

 

  1. Anonymous
    Jan 11, 2016
    No one deserves to be in so much pain and so hurt, however your hurt and pain are the result of such great love, that of which many will never experience in a lifetime! I know these words don't make it easier or right to have lost your love, but it brings a smile to my face when I read the true love you two shared and knowing that this does still exist amongst all the divorces, single parent children and "fake" lives going on. Heartwarming and forever in your heart and memories. No one can take that away xo
    Reply