Days like that….

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Days like that….

Not my worst day…it just wasn’t…

Was it a mish mash of too busy…rear ending someone…a doctors appointment…kid scramble sort of day….

I don’t think so….I had time…time spent alone…and it wasn’t bad….It wasn’t sitting around with my love….I couldn’t touch her hand…but I’ve had worse days….

Yesterday seemed pretty good, I can’t remember when I decided to leave the warmth of my bed but it was likely something like this morning, 4 am.  It’s not bad, 6 hours of sleep…for me it’s just fine.  The morning scramble went well, outside of a slight fender bender…sadly the rear end of a Hyundai SUV is absolutely no match for the front bumper of a full sized dodge pickup…

Not a scratch on the truck…about 15% of the value of the Hyundai in damage at 5 kilometers per hour…maybe slower…

Well, that is how it goes for Mr. Wheeler these days…

beautiful dirty Evelyn

 

Now….you’d think after 2 months I would at least be able to post a picture of my beautiful wife and not cry….

Today will not be the first day I don’t cry…..

I don’t want to cry every day….I don’t WANT to…….

The issue is, once it starts it pours out the emotions you’ve saved…and I rather save them right now…I’ll save them for lonely quicksand events…..

Just look at that woman!!!  Just look at her……..

I miss you so much babe………….

I had a massage at the shop yesterday, something Ev used to nag me to do all the time, my back always hurt and she would ask if she could make me an appointment…and of course I always said no…

But since she has been gone I’ve tried to undertake her wants, and yesterday’s massage found me in and out of consciousness…

I would fall asleep for just a minute or 2 at a time….and she was there….

I dreamt of her for just 2 or 3 seconds….she was in the water beside me, the ocean or at the cottage….floating alongside a small raft, or floating chair….her head on the arm of it…she was relaxed….

She glowed….she was light….and she wore a white bathing suit…..

She didn’t move…she didn’t turn to look at me….she just floated, smiling up at the sun…..

wracking….

Hey….to see her when I close my eyes….I’d give anything for that….

Seems simple to those of you reading this, but in my life I can’t make dreams of her…the dreams don’t come….

Eating with PGX shakes??? The Weigh In

Ummm…Yesterday I had a PGX shake for breakfast and…well dinnerish…

Dinnerish is what I will now refer first dinner to…dinnerish…

I also had a piece of salmon and a cup or 2 of raw veg for lunch….I may have crushed a meat stick or 2…or 4, a hard boiled egg, another cup or 2 of raw veg, a handful of nuts….and maybe…4 teeny tiny spring rolls…

Is that it……ya, I think that might be it….

I did see 210.8 pounds on the scale today…also…today I plan on only having PGX shakes…which sucks as I baked 4 salmon steaks yesterday…I hope Charlotte is hungry!

Now…I’m not sure if all of that food and PGX shakes is to blame….but I may have spent more time in the bathroom than is normally considered acceptable….

Okay….seeing as I’ve offered up plenty of photoshopped photos of the boys, Andy has dared me to offer up this one of myself.

Vic Wheeler and Billy
There we go…and Andy thought I’d be embarrassed and wouldn’t post this photo…

Hey, these are the days when I was skinny before…I’ll post myself in a dress at under 210 anyday.

I feel bad for Billy, stuck in the middle with me…but he does pull that skimpy little number off pretty well.

Looking at this photo makes my laugh for a strange reason…Anger…I can look over 100 photos and see me making this face in a dozen of them….

Anger…well….a dozen is better than 100…

And look at how happy Parker is there not having dressed for this photo opportunity…

Carlingwood opened their doors yesterday, the floors polished and vacuumed…Trafford did an extra lap!

Trafford finds himself at 165.5 pounds this morning!!!

Half a pound away from his target…it’s a done deal.

So that is 2 of us, I’m going to hit my target today also…just drinking strawberry flavored foam….

Parker and Beagle are still in bed for another couple of hours…dreaming of Big Macs and soda….well parker is dreaming of curry and beer…the UK equivalent…

Parker’s update yesterday was 245.8, he still has to drop 6 pounds…I don’t know…

Beagle has begun the 185 diet…he did tell me that yesterday was not the first day he didn’t have sugar….smart ass.

He will see 185…hopefully not before I see 205…

The Quote of The Day

We are braver and wiser because they existed, those strong women and strong men… We are who we are because they were who they were. It’s wise to know where you come from, who called your name.
Maya Angelou

Yesterday I found out that an old friend lost her husband…leaving 2 young boys…

I’m going through the same thing…and there is nothing I can say or do to help…I know that.  I hope that each and every one of her moments have some light…and I hope in the darkest times she has help…

Today’s quote is for the Cinnamon-Pertersen family…my own…and to all of us that are stronger for having been a part of a great person’s life…

Vicki Cinnamon-Petersen

Thanks today to Jocelyn, Gin, Mandy, Sarah, Nancy, Krista, Michelle, Megan, Karen, Jennifer, My Sister, Bridgitte…this could be a long list…but so many people I know, so many of our old friends help me every day…raise my ladies…

We should all have this sort of support every day, for no reason at all….the world would be a better place.

Cold….

Babe…do what you do today…show me the way….I love your face…………….

 

  1. Anonymous
    Feb 18, 2015
    Good Morning! My favorite blog thus far! Yes,life is so difficult for us all at times. We all get a crack at grief, we all must have out turn at some point. Today, i sense some humour in your blog! If just for today, i smile because perhaps may be today will be a good day for you! Love You!❤️
    Reply